


Mouth of the Cave

by Septdeneuf



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Gen, RvB Angst War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-18
Updated: 2016-04-18
Packaged: 2018-06-03 01:43:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6591493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Septdeneuf/pseuds/Septdeneuf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>RvB Angst War prompt from littlefists: How about Blue Team (any members of Blue Team that you like) and the line, "Are you sure you know what you’re doing?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mouth of the Cave

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" 

"Of course I'm sure, relax and stop distracting me, Tucker!", Epsilon huffed. Just because Tucker had spent more time with Alpha who hadn't known that he was an AI didn't mean that he had a reason to doubt Epsilon's computer skills. 

"Oh, don't worry about it. Take your time, little computer guy." But, well, it wasn't like Tucker didn't have a reason to be nervous. Felix's smarmy tones making their way through the intercom could put anyone on edge. Not Church, though, obviously, since he was a computer program and way to calm and collected to be worried about the deadly mercenary. No, really. 

"Fuck that, Church, do your thing", Tucker encouraged. Their mission hadn't been supposed to be that difficult, a supply run on an old abandoned Fed outpost, scouting whether or not it was worth it to try and settle it again. Easy, in, take a look around, grab whatever might be useful and leave again. The newly reunited army of Chorus didn't have too many people to spare, so Tucker had offered to just go on his own, which Washington had protested until Carolina suggested he take Epsilon. 

Not that Church wanted to brag or anything, but if he hadn't, Tucker would probably be dead already. 

Because fucking Felix had been at the outpost for whatever reason. 

Retreat had seemed like the smartest option when he'd shown up on Church's trackers. He still vividly remembered the last time Tucker and Felix had met, when the internal sensors told Epsilon that the suit's integrity was compromised, and he'd been caught between freaking out that Tucker had been fucking stabbed, and and cutting the helmet cam footage into a highlight reel of Felix's douchebaggery. 

But of course Felix had spotted them. Church had been able to hack into the door controls on their way through the base, surprised to find that most systems were still functional despite the place having been abandoned for nearly a year. But that wasn't true for every single door, and that was how they found themselves in their current predicament. 

They'd run into some kind of airlock, and while it had been easy to slam the door they'd come in through in Felix's face, the door they needed to get the fuck out of here was stubbornly refusing to budge. Even though it had fucking power, somehow the algorithms were fucked up and Church was digging through the programming of the control panel trying to find the fucking door controls. 

"You know, if this kind of thing had happened a few weeks ago, I would've offered you a deal. You know, give me AI and the alien plasma sword, and I let you live, that kind of thing", Felix said conversationally. "But now, I just want you to die in agony too much to be that accommodating."

"The feeling's mutual, asshole", Tucker shot back. Felix was looking in through a porthole in the door he was stuck behind, and Epsilon had to wonder how a helmet could look so fucking evil. And how, considering that, the New Republic hadn't realized this cuntnugget was up to something the entire time. 

"I'm gonna have so much fun", Felix went on. "Take you back to my murder cave, cut into tiny little pieces and mail them to your friends, it'll be great." 

"Jesus fuck, do you even hear yourself?", Tucker said. He didn't sound like he was scared, but even through his shallow connection with his neural implants Church could tell how much Tucker wanted him to just get done opening this door already. 

"I do. It's great, I have a lovely speaking voice", the mercenary crooned. 

"I don't know, the deranged serial killer vibes are kinda off putting", Tucker commented. Epsilon couldn't agree more. What the fuck was up with this door? He'd finally found the program responsible for opening it, but it was fucking encrypted. What the fuck would the Feds need to encrypt their freaking doors for? Especially for a door leading outside? That way wasn't supposed to lock in public buildings, so people could escape in case of fire, or evil mercenary, or whatever, right? 

"Oh, but it brings me so much joy." Felix pressed a hand to his heart exaggeratedly. "Imagining how I'm going to dig a knife through your eyeball is second only to actually doing it on the list of 'Things that put a smile on my face'" 

"Church, hurry the fuck up", Tucker hissed. "I don't want to go to Felix's fucking murder cave!" 

"I know, I'm working on it", Epsilon hissed back. To be fair, he was getting a bit nervous himself. There was a timed release on the other door if the door Church was working on wasn't opened, probably as a fail safe to stop people from getting stuck in the air lock forever, and the timer would run out in two minutes. Which was a lot of time for someone working in an AI time frame, but in the three minutes they'd already been in there, Church hadn't made any real headway on opening the other door. Who the fuck had programmed this thing? 

When he'd finally managed his way through the last level of encryption, he realized two things. 

1\. The Feds weren't the ones who had programmed this fucking door. 

2\. They were royally screwed. 

When the hidden virus attacked him, he barely had time to disconnect himself from Tucker's suit, so that at the very least he could avoid scrambling his teammate's brains. None of Epsilon's routine firewalls were doing anything, the virus knew exactly where to attack, in a way that could've only been programmed by someone who already had extensive records of Project Freelancer's AI source code. 

The last thing Church saw before his higher functions were forcefully deactivated, was the door sliding open. 

The vile sound of Felix's laugh seemed to seep into Epsilon's code as he was shut down.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks a lot for the prompt! 
> 
> I'm still looking for prompts, so if anyone feels like sending one, hit me up on tumblr: kyuunonana.tumblr.com


End file.
